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Due Dates Are A Myth

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You interview and hire the perfect midwife. Pregnancy goes smoothly, and 40 weeks comes and goes. You near 41 weeks of pregnancy.

You KNOW your baby is healthy. You KNOW your body is healthy. You feel your baby’s movement, you feel connected, you intuitively know everything is just right. You know your baby just needs some more time to develop and your body needs some more time to prepare.

At your 41 week prenatal appointment, your midwife informs you that her license or certification does not allow her to attend your birth once you reach 42 weeks of pregnancy, even if everything is perfect, and she will need to transfer care to the hospital.

She gives you alternatives: “natural” induction. Sex, nipple stimulation, pumping, walking, miles circuit, eating spicy food, eating an entire pineapple, taking homeopathics, taking herbs, drinking castor oil, so on.

You feel betrayed, pressured, anxious, stressed, and torn between what to do. Instead of resting, nesting, and enjoying the last couple days/weeks of pregnancy, you are now in a state that is opposite to what your body needs to feel to begin labor.

One of the most important questions you need to ask a potential midwife is: what happens after 40, 41, 42+ weeks?!

40 week due dates are based on the idea that women have 28 day cycles and ovulate on the 14th day, and that’s not true for every woman.

Research shows that only around 50% of women go into labor by the 40th week.

Standardized care does not take into account that babies are individuals that develop on their own timelines. Some babies are ready sooner, some later.

Our body doesn’t begin to fail just because we’ve reached 40 weeks. But stressing out about the uncertainty of where and with who you will birth can have negative effects.

Now imagine hiring someone who doesn’t have any regulations. She is aware of your gestation and she is also aware of the health of your body and baby. Together, you wait, rest, nourish, and observe the body for signs of health (our body always speaks to us!) in the last weeks of pregnancy. You both are calm and peaceful. There is no pressure or stress. You trust each other and collaborate together with everyone’s wellbeing in mind.

If you’re hiring support for your pregnancy and home birth, hire wisely. It is wise to hire someone who believes and practices with individualized care and serves YOU above all. 

Someone who doesn’t adhere to silly guidelines that are unsupportive of physiology. 

Someone who KNOWS the process, trusts the process, and knows what’s normal and what’s not. 

Don’t blindly reassure yourself that you would never be pregnant past 42 weeks.

Most of the time, there are no issues going past 42 weeks. Some women even go to 43 and 44 weeks, some of whom I know personally that have went on to have beautiful births. Some babies just need more time. Some bodies need more time.

We wouldn’t take an undercooked cake out of the oven. 

Why are we kicking underdeveloped babies out of the womb?

Why are we following guidelines established  200 years ago instead of following God’s wise design for physiological reproduction that has withstood the test of time for thousands of years?

Do we know when the body has the perfect hormonal cocktail ready to start and finish the birthing process safely?

Yes, you are eager to meet your baby. The last few weeks of pregnancy is the hardest waiting period. 

But the last few weeks are also crucial to your baby’s development to survive out of the womb. 

Yes, you could kick your baby out earlier, but that doesn’t guarantee that they will be able to stay in your arms immediately after birth. 

Your baby will never stay inside your womb without purpose.

If you could trust your body to conceive your baby and grow your baby, then trust that it knows the perfect time for your baby to come.

It is of utmost importance to your body to protect your baby while they are in the womb. This doesn’t change at any point in your pregnancy. 

Physiology knows no deadlines. 

Don’t settle for “natural” induction. It is still an intervention and is unsupportive of physiology. Why would you bring allopathy into your pregnancy and home, when that is what you’re trying to avoid by hiring a midwife and birthing at home?

What are some ways to make the last few weeks and days of pregnancy easier?

  • Begin your pregnancy with the mindset that you WILL go past 42 weeks.
  • Get rid of negative, untrue terminology, such as “overdue”.
  • Educate yourself on the actual risks of a longer pregnancy instead of listening to fear-mongering.
  • Read positive affirmations daily to focus your brain on the truths of physiological design. You can purchase my favorite affirmations here. Listen to or read positive birth stories. You can find my favorite podcasts here under “podcasts, under “pregnancy”.
  • Surround yourself with people who support you, trust you as the expert of your body and baby, and won’t fear-monger you.
  • Consider sharing your baby’s due window: sharing the period of time between 36-44 weeks. Consider using this for yourself as well, instead of a due date. If you do choose to use your estimated due date, consider calling it your “guess date”, as it is estimated that only 5% of babies are actually born on their estimated due date.
  • Do something that makes you comfortable and happy every single day. I personally chose to take daily magnesium baths in pregnancy to relax my body and mind, and connect with my toddler when she would join. Spend time outside in nature and in the sun. Dance and sing. Nourish your body.
  • Keep your phone in Do Not Disturb mode to minimize phone calls from excited or concerned family and friends. Implement firm boundaries.
  • Plan fun dates with your spouse and family during the last few weeks to have something to look forward to. Connect with your family and enjoy your family dynamic, as it will change when the newest member joins.
  • Prepare postpartum freezer meals and prepare for babys arrival.

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