Companies thrive when they convince you that you are a better mom with their product.
People make billions of dollars if they can convince you that you are insufficient or dangerous to your baby.
- Medicalized pregnancies
- Medicalized births
- Swaddles
- Pacifiers
- Formula
- Bottles
- Pumps
- Bassinets that mimic shushing and swaying
- Cribs
- Sleep training
- Baby containers
- Nanny
- Daycare
How absurd is it to think that your body creates and sustains your baby in the womb, but becomes dangerous or insufficient to your baby the moment they are born?
- “Your placenta is aging and failing.”
- “We need to monitor your baby continuously in labor.”
- “Sleeping with your baby will kill your baby.”
- “You don’t have enough breastmilk.”
- “Your nipples aren’t compatible for breastfeeding.”
- “Rocking your baby to sleep will teach them to rely only on you.”
- “You’re creating bad habits if you always soothe your baby with your breast.”
- “Oh just give them a pacifier, they sometimes cry for no reason.”
- “If you don’t train your baby to sleep, they’ll never sleep.”
We were designed to be an answer to all of our baby’s needs.
We were designed with connection and intimacy in mind, something that can’t be replicated or replaced by any device.
Companies can create a replacement for everything you naturally provide for your baby and it will still never be enough, because it lacks YOU.
It lacks your soothing voice, your gentle touch, your delicious scent, your warm breath, your familiar heartbeat, your soft skin, your comforting rhythm, your tangible compassion and love and comfort.
You are all that is needed for your baby to thrive.
You were enough for your baby in pregnancy and you are enough for your baby after your baby is born.
I know we don’t live in a perfect world. Many of us don’t have a tangible village that we can actually rely on. Some have to go back to work too soon. Our parents and our lifestyle choices may have compromised our health. We are surrounded by environmental factors that impact our and our baby’s health.
These tools can be beneficial to many of us.
But I find it a comfort to know that we were originally designed to be an answer to all of our baby’s needs.
We were designed to be the best answer for our baby.
Nothing else is needed. You are enough and more than enough.
Sometimes, all we need is a mindset shift that our baby IS supposed to be with us all the time after they are born.
The world screams at us to go back to work, to bounce back to your pre-pregnancy body, to have a spotless house, to have it all together at all times, while our babies plead for us to hold them, stay with them, give them the love and connection that they so need to thrive.
It’s not our design that is broken.
It’s our village-less society. It’s our hyper-medicalized society. It’s our toxic society. It’s our unhealthy society. It’s our afraid-of-death society. It’s our hyper-independent society. It’s our hyper-sexualized society. It’s our vain society. It’s our selfish society.
As a society, if we can come to an acceptance and understanding that our baby needs us and thrives only with us, then we can begin supporting mothers so that they remain with their babies.
Replacing mothers with lifeless objects is not the answer.
Replacing mothers with other people is not the answer.
Supporting the mother and baby dyad IS the answer.
That is how we can begin to heal our messed up society.
That is how we set up the next generation for success.
That is how we destroy the hyper-independent, village-less society.
That is how we create a more peaceful and safer society.
